"I've been thinking a lot lately about love and how it pertains to raising Evan. The devotions keep bringing up that love has no fear. Each time I think, 'The problem isn't fear but anger'. But today, when I read this, "Have no fear, for perfect love decimates fear", God revealed to me there is a fear with Evan. Feat that he will grow up to be disrespectful, disobedient, mouthy, etc., etc. And that's why I'm so hard on him. I want to control those things. I want to know the outcome. I want to know that he knows the boundaries - and I feel I need to do everything in my power to assure these things happen. But, alas, I can't. I can only surrender to God and allow him to show me."
"Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers a multitude of sins." 1 Peter 4:8. Or it could say, love covers a multitude of mistakes. As a parent I am going to make mistakes, but if I am raising Evan in the perfect love of Jesus, those mistakes will be covered. It doesn't take away the hard work, but it totally changes my perspective. I don't have to be a tyrant to get Evan to obey. Just the opposite!! I need to lavish him with love.
"When you try to peer into the future and prepare for every possibility, you ignore your constant Companion."
So, in trying to force Evan to conform, I've excluded the One who can make it happen.
Let all that I am wait quietly before God.
He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken.
My victory and honor come from God alone.
He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me.
The enemy has certainly tried to reach me through parenting...but today I am claiming the victory! I'm not mothering alone. I have the creator of the world on my side. No, it won't make everything perfect. We will still have bad days...maybe even terrible days, but 1 Peter 4:8 will still ring true. Our mistakes and sins will be covered. When those bad, terrible moments are upon us (or sometimes after they have passed) we will seek God. We will ask forgiveness and there will be victory. Satan won't win in our house. My child belongs to the King of Kings. I will stop trying to make him conform and simply start loving him with the love Jesus bestows upon me. And what a difference it will make!